everything didn’t seem right
it was too crowded, but too silent at the same time
tired of running, but these feet just cannot stand still
the silence hurts even more in stillness
in need of a beautiful release
although i don’t have even the faintest idea where it is
for the first time after few months i shed a tear after realizing how lost i was
how i was being too stubborn to listen, too stubborn to surrender
how the source for the strength i need is actually not that far away
i only need to see deep down inside
HE is waiting there.
so i finally asked Him last Saturday
do You still have one more hug for this naughty little girl?
and on Sunday, i know He answered YES.
i know it from everything i heard at church that morning
i know it from the way everything made me feel
yes, i can feel again.
after months of numb-ness.
months of emptiness.
i can feel the warmth.
i can feel the tranquility.
I finally surrender to His much greater powers
He can change everything on a finger click
He can change how the world goes round in a blink of an eye
dammit. what made me think that i can beat that?
I know He’s been waiting there, waiting for me to return
I know He’s been having this plan how my life should go, even before the day i was born
I know He’ll give me all the good things,
all i need to do is to believe and to trust my life onto Him
and everything will be alright.
no need to run around. no need to undergo that endless search.
the turmoil has ended.
i am returning home.